My Secret Weapon

Ive discovered a secret weapon to add to my arsenal while I wage war with this fat! Greek yogurt with fruit is the absolute shit! The yogurt is 0% fat and the fruit has barely any calories , and best of all it tastes delicious.

I had some Greek yogurt last night with a chopped up apple and some blueberries and it was like 200 calories for that, that’s not bad at all considering how much is in it.

I started looking up fruit calories online then and was amazed by it, 2 apples is only 100 cal and you could eat a whole pound of Strawberries and it’d be the same, so a whole packet is 100 cal. Plus it tastes so damn good with all the natural sugars in it, and best of all its good for you.

When your eating an unhealthy obese persons diet you scoff at fruit and veg and sneer thinking ‘ why should I even bother’. You imagine its bland and ‘healthy’ so its not worth a fuck. But once you decide to go for it and get into healthy eating you realize that the crap you were eating is actually what was bland. The same burgers, sausages, bacon over and over just the same aul tastes everyday had you blinded, you only thought it was nice because of the grease. It was safe and predictable. You were in denial.

Once you start tucking into salads and fruits and the like, it soon dawns on you that youve never tasted so many flavours all in one bowl! Its an overload, like a shock to the system  and its so good! Theres so many possibilities now for meals, salads, soups, stir fries, omelettes, a whole new world is opened up to you that was locked off by your ignorance. And best of all , all the greasy and sugary foods are still there for cheat days!!

Its like when you face fear. The fear is controlling you without you knowing it, by giving in your shutting off potential good times and opportunities you would have if you faced the fear and went out. You become miserable because you’ve imprisoned yourself in a shitty life with no options, because everywhere you turn , fear is there saying nope. your not allowed to do that, its not possible. And you give in because your so used to it. It makes your world smaller and smaller.

Until you face up to the fear, and realize that it gets weaker and weaker the more you do the things you fear, then once you understand you can conquer fear, nothing scares you because you know that whatever happens your strong enough to handle it!

A fear of having to eat lettuce for years in misery was holding me back. Fear and dread of exercise. Fear of fucking up and failing, but I had to say ‘fuck this’ and get in shape, or at least try to because being fat made me even more miserable, but I didnt know it because I was in denial.

Being this fat, its hard getting out there and meeting people. Whole areas of my life are blocked off as no go zones because of fear. I cant run either, Im too fat. I need XXL clothes, I get out of breath going up the stairs, and carrying all this weight around is both heavy and a health risk. But I blocked it all out for years because at least I had stabilized my schizophrenia.

So now, with my meds at the right dosages, its time to tackle this weight. I will succeed. It’ll open up opportunities for relationships, I can do dope rap videos and look good. I can jog and run and shit, even wear normal clothes! Plus, once I succeed its going to be a great success story.

2019 is the year I #Getfitordietryin

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